Sunday, April 01, 2007

el fin pt. 2 "the revenge"

Hey folks, after a few revisions I'm re-posting the essay.

App has been submitted (2 days later than I had hoped, but still technically on time). So..here's to hoping.




Transferring
I consistently fail to see how the name of an educational institution dictates the type of education received. Quite frankly, expert education (sans a few specific courses of study) can be received at many, if not all, accredited universities and colleges. The question arises then, why (if I believe that good and bad professors exists everywhere, and that essentially all schools are equal in that regard) would I even consider leaving a 4-year university where I stand a good chance of graduating on time, and without much effort? I would respond to this query by asking a question of my own: what good is the time spent earning the degree, if I am unhappy for the duration? A university education is more than just working towards a career goal. Colloquial wisdom says that these are the best years of my life and I have no reason to disagree I've been given four years to grow as an adult with the added benefits of emotional and financial support. During this time I plan to learn about anything and everything I am interested in, by exploring multiple disciplines, meeting new people with diverse views and by putting myself into challenging situations in which I will gain life experiences.
My ideal university experience includes passionate discussion and debate not just in, but out of class as well. So far, this has eluded me. While I find some of my classes as great platforms for probing and prodding issues for greater understanding (a joy of mine), generally this does not leave the classroom. I get frustrated when I try to continue debate and discussion outside of my classes, as my fellow students seem uninterested. I find this contributes to my not connecting or building lasting relationships with my peers. There is just a certain set of circumstances working against satisfaction in my current setting. One, most students I interact with are from the tri-state area (New York, New Jersey, and Connecticut), and have cars. Two, the top the subjects of commonality are Business, Nursing, and Sports in that order. Three, in some but not all cases a “high-school” mentality still exists. By this I mean the ideals of popularity contests, partying like it is the end of the world, and excessive (albeit playful) use of certain derogatory insults. Let me also make clear that none of the people I have run into are undesirable. Despite traits that I dislike, nobody I have run into is a “bad” person, rather one that I personally have trouble connecting with.
Due to this lack of connection, I’ve had to resort to other means of enjoying myself. I take particular interest in exploration. However, I’ve found few people who are willing to join me in simply walking around New York City and giving into impulses. I recently went into town and met with a few friends (whom I’d previously known) to just walk around. We ended up downtown, in Battery Park for a bit and then headed up to Chinatown for dinner in the first place that looked good. I'm glad I have at least a few people who value exploration as I do, but I'd like to have a larger group of people to connect with. I want to come home after 4 years and be able to say I had some amazing experiences while at school, that I met some great people, had a great time, not only academically but personally. Connection, experience and opportunity are big parts of what the college experience is about. It's not necessarily learning things in class, but gaining life experience, and knowledge from nouns (people, places and things) around me. I am no longer a stranger to New York City, and I wish to share my own experiences with new people. Everything ends up back at people. NYU offers a larger student base with which I can explore. My current situation severally limits the people who I come in contact with, and this needs to change. I consider myself an open-minded person; I consider my self and accepting person. However, open mindedness, and acceptance are two-way doors.
This is not to say that I have not tried to look for people. The majority of my time here has been spent looking for my niche. However, I feel limited. As I have mentioned, my current university tends to have certain labels attached to it. The majority of the student body is made up of only a few similar personalities, and of people who share similar goals. The other limiting factor is the smaller size of the school. There is less of a sampling for me to explore. The school’s size also has provided me (or at least feels like it provided me) with less opportunity. While I am still unsure myself of what I want to do with my life, I want to be able to explore different fields within my own interests in order to eventually make a choice. In my current university, I feel almost trapped. I’ve made an effort to explore my school’s New York City campus (by commuting down via Metro-North every Monday and Wednesday for class) in order to free myself. While I feel much more free down in the city, I somehow still feel trapped.
What I have now, is not enough. I feel like I am missing something here, as if something hasn’t clicked yet. I’ve spent as much time as I could evaluating and re-evaluating my position now. I’ve stuck it out with my current school for as long as I could, but now it is time for a change. I am not meeting my academic and collegiate goals, and I need to put myself in a place where these goals can be achieved. I have been unable to meet new people, put myself in challenging situations. Summed up, I need a bigger sandbox to play in. And perhaps in this new sandbox, I will be able to find more kids who are willing to play.
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