Sosumi

I’m bad with updates…sosumi (so sue me, obscure Apple reference).
So, I’m in this weird state of mind tonight. I guess I have fallen back into that lazy stage we all love falling back into. Problem is, I fall into this rut far too often. Over the last four days I have done zero work. Not one school related task has be fronted me. Not one singe piece of work. It’s amazing. I stopped going to the gym, I stopped eating right. I guess, I guess I’m just tired. I am tried of dealing with school, and with myself really. I crave for vacation, but I don’t know if I deserve one.
Well at least I know one thing, whatever job I go into I better really love it. I even have a quote set out to be my mantra: “You know you have reached success when you can’t remember if what your doing is work or play.”
Wish I could remember who said that.
I really should not blog at 1:30a.m. Oh well.
-Matt

New Podcast?

Yes. :)
I finally got around to doing a Podcast for the school yesterday. I know it's been a while, heh.

Anyway, check it out at radio.wildwood.org .

I R teh Stressed

One would think with the two weeks given to spend doing absolutely nothing, I would have fun. But for one reason or another, I remain annoyed with the world and it’s inhabitants. Perhaps it’s the over exposure to my siblings. I need to get out more.
Yet, who do I go out to do something with?

Friends.

Now, I have some strange views on friendship. There are varying degrees of friendship.
There are
Acquaintances- people you know, say hi to online every so often etc.
Semi-friends- those who you hang out with from time to time, but don’t really go anywhere or do anything with.
And,
Friends- the people you know will be there fore you, those who you can share anything with and always feel comfortable. In many ways, these people are trusted more than close family members.
This is me at least. Now, I have many of the first and second group, but not to many of the last. If I were any normal teenager, I would probably be disappointed. For one reason or another (I’m no social analyst) many of us crave this feeling of love from everyone. Not me.

Hell, I don’t even crave my so-called Semi-Friends. I am happy with a core group of one or two people I can whole-heartedly trust and know.
It just makes more sense to me.

Anywho, I could go on for pages on my views of friendship, but that is not what today’s (late) post is fore. Today, I am talking about why I am bored and possibly lonely.
Now, due to fact that the majority of those I hang out with live 14 miles from me, I find myself at home annoyed, pissed off and just angry in general. It sort of makes me disheartened to know that I am not Mr. Popular, but at the same time I am comforted by the fact that I can keep a few people close, and that is all I need. It just gets hard not being “normal”. There are times I wish that I was able to call someone up and go to a party, but I know that is not me at all.

So with all this thinking comes the stress I was hoping to get rid of on this break. In any case, I am feeling less stressed than I did on the weeks leading up to this break.
Now it is time to clear my head lest I start thinking about the minimal amount of time I have to do two senior projects and prepare my exhibition. Oh Joy.